Capello announces squad for Andorra game

England coach, Fabio Capello, has announced a surprise squad for saturday’s World Cup qualifier against lowly Andorra, with every single player making their England debut.

In a tactical masterstroke the continental genius has decided to match Andorra man-for-man by filling the team with part-timer ratcatchers, postmen, old pros who never made it above the old 4th division and Jimmy Bullard.
In a potentially contraversial move, possibly designed to motivate his underperforming ‘star players’, the captains armband will be passed to Dover Athletic central defender and Ocado delivery driver, Terry Johns, a player that Capello is said to have admired since his perfect delivery of groceries to his swanky West London apartment last week.
During a press conference at a transport cafe just outside South East London, Capello explained that “commentators and so-called, experts, are forever telling us that a group of Sunday league players could beat the likes of Andorra, so I intend to test this theory, after all this team could hardly play worse than McClaren’s bunch of clowns who played in the fixture at Barcelona last season. After all who needs Steven Gerrard to spray 45 yard passes straight into the crowd when I can get someone from the Southern Amateur league to do it just as well?”
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Explore posts in the same categories: England, Fabio Capello, Jimmy Bullard

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