Liverpool name new Managing Director

 

 

Crowds gather to watch the unveiling of Liverpool's new MD

Crowds gather to watch the unveiling of Liverpool's new MD

Liverpool today named Christian Purslow, 45, as their new managing director who will take overall charge of the club until a suitably useless replacement for outgoing chief executive and former head of the Premier League, Rick Parry, is found.

Mr Purslow has a degree from Cambridge,  an MBA from Harvard Business School and a Liverpool season ticket holder, although it has been rumoured that he bought them all on E-bay from a man in Singapore.

He speaks fluent Spanish and has an extensive knowledge of overpriced mediocre Primera Liga players and so will liaise with manager Rafael Benitez on his summer signings.

Co-owner George Gillett told the club’s official website. “There’s a lot to get done and Christian will be a valuable addition to the team… unlike most of Rafa’s on field signings!”

“Tom Hicks and I felt that it was important to put a highly experienced and respected executive in place to run the club and support the senior team and the manager but in the end we could only convince Christian to take on the role,” he said.

Co-owner Hicks added: “Christian has been a great supporter of the club for… oooh… at least three years, and in that time, since the Champions  League win in Istanbul, he’s built up great relationships at Anfield.” 

“His strategic and commercial acumen will be a real asset and we’re delighted that he has made a long term commitment to the club. Now all we need to do is brainwok his ideas into the mix, step them up to the plate and fly them from the flagpole to see which way the Soccerball is headed” he added before descending into a torrent of business jargon which made about as much sense as a plot explanation from a time travel episode of ‘Star Trek – The Next Generation’.

Purslow is an executive board member and co-founder of private equity firm MidOcean Partners, his knowledge of football comes from his extensive collection of “Shoot” magazines from the 1980s and watching Sky Sport’s coverage of La Liga.

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